Post Ordination Fallout

Before my ordination, my colleagues told me that it's a life-changing process, and one that often involves huge life changes, meltdowns, crises, breakups, etc. After the ordination, I felt great on an emotional and spiritual level. I felt clearer, more committed, freer, different and yet more myself than ever. I thought that was all that would happen for me.

Alas no. It's happening to me right now. Currently, I'm unexpectedly single and homeless without enough income to support myself independently. I'm calling on the Gods for help. I'm leaning on the support of my community. I'm submitting resumes left and right. I'm putting out the call - I need a part-time job and a place to live (housesitting, roommate, etc).

It's terrifying. Never before have I been in so precarious a situation. I've worked so hard to build my new career in the last four years. I've worked equally hard to get more education to support that career. I've also worked just as hard at healing myself and putting my tumultuous, tragic past to rest. I simply can't throw away all that work and quit all my self-employment activities. That's a sacrifice I'm not currently willing to make. 

Of course, when it comes right down to it, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get my life back on track. I must believe, though, that this can manifest in a way that allows me to keep practicing massage, teaching and priestessing. To keep building my professional network and reputation. To keep manifesting the life of my dreams:

I dream of having a home with a lot of land. I dream of creating an intentional community, educational and healing center. I dream of that community producing as much of what we need to sustain our lives as we can. I dream of living a sustainable life in stewardship of our land. I dream of us supporting and sheltering artists, musicians and writers. I dream of sharing my gifts with people who visit our center - teaching, doing healing work, taking people on trips, hosting retreats, holding ceremonies, honoring the spirits of place, creating a sacred sanctuary and mystery school. I dream of traveling around the country and around the world teaching and inspiring others to reach THEIR own potential and manifest THEIR own dreams. 

I dream of having a supportive, positive, respectful and fun community around me. I dream of having healthy relationships (platonic, familial and romantic) with mutual sharing, supporting, loving and growing. I dream of one day waking up to know that I am well and truly SAFE and HOME. To feel that I belong somewhere, to feel that I am doing my true work, to feel that what I do matters.

Truly, I have some of these things already. I have met many wonderful people who make my life a richer, more beautiful experience. All of my current work is my true work. 

But not everything is wine and roses for me, just like everyone else. Some awful things from my past are still a problem. My awesome career still isn't profitable yet. This last romantic relationship will take some time to process and recover from. I have no home.

In 2010, I sacrificed my material security on the altar of personal need and desire. I simply could not see the way out of a life that no longer fit me. I had spent several years trying to decide what I wanted, how to change, what to do…to no avail. I quit my corporate job, packed my truck full of backpacking gear and put the rest of my possessions in storage. I drove across the country, leaving my beloved Colorado behind. I returned to North Carolina, greeted friends and family, then embarked on a literal walkabout on the Appalachian Trail.

Two months later, my knees gave out. I returned to Raleigh to do some physical therapy. I did that, but I never did get back on the trail. I ended up staying here to go to school and re-launch my career as an entrepreneur. Along the way, massive amounts of unplanned but vitally necessary self-healing occurred. It's been messy, difficult, awesome and a wild adventure.

Right now, there's only a few things that I know for certain:

1. I have worked too hard to make this life change to give up on my dreams.
2. I will only expend my energy on people who treat me with courtesy and respect.
3. The Universe is supporting me in this change.
4. Every day, I take steps to get my life in order.

Blessings, positive energy, gifts of light, monetary donations and any other type of support appreciated. Posts will be minimal while I get through this transition. Your support and understanding mean the world to me!

3000 Blog Visitors

Rattle, Roar & Ritual has passed the 3,000 visitors mark! I am so grateful to have this outlet for my thoughts, opinions and ideas about spirituality. It is helping me transform and move into the next phase of my life. It is my sincere hope that my posts are helpful, amusing or inspiring to you in some way. Thank you for reading and commenting!

Ethical Symbolism

A lot of Pagans begin their journey as solitaries, with books. I was sort of in that category myself. Actually, I had a ritual partner who was at the same point in the journey, and we did support each other quite a bit. But having said that, I mostly studied books on my own at first.

In most Pagan 101 books, a brief section is devoted to symbolism. Allow me to generalize and give you a summary:

"Hey guys, symbols are great and powerful - you should use them! Here are a few lists of magical alphabets and other mysterious symbols from around the world. Naw, don't worry, you're a baby witch, WHAT COULD GO WRONG?! You can use symbols in spells, write your Book of Shadows in a secret alphabet, make sigils and create talismans. Oh, and mark all your most personal ritual tools with these things, too! Yay symbols!"

At the time, I didn't think too much about it. But on the other hand, I didn't use any symbol that I didn't really understand or with which I had no cultural connection. I also didn't think too much about my avoidance of these things…in retrospect, it really was intuition. Thanks be to the Goddess for which, by the by!

Here's the thing: there is a big divide in opinions about symbolism. Some people are of the opinion that symbols only have what power we give them. Others believe that the symbol itself becomes imbued with energy accumulated by past usage of that symbol by many people.

I personally fall into the second camp. I think that symbols speak to us on the deepest levels of our being, and that powerful symbols become so to the degree that they do so. That's a mouthful. Let's show that in another way:

Symbol--->Evokes powerful emotion/transformation--->Symbol gets used by many people=Powerful Symbol

So what is this mysterious energy that imbues symbols? I believe that it's the residue of the ritual energy of the many human beings who have used the symbol, and that it is stored in the Akashic Records, aka the collective unconscious. So you could say that symbols are sub-language keys to universal wisdom.

Pretty heavy, right? I also think symbols deserve a bit more than a tiny section in an overview book.
Now, I understand the challenges that authors face. There is a lot to know when embarking on a study of magic, and space is limited. I'm certainly not targeting any particular author or book (above image of symbols is just an example). I get it. But it's also fairly irresponsible to write a book aimed at complete newbies wherein you tell them to use symbols without explaining why.

This same principle applies to Pagan clergy, ritual leaders, teachers and mentors. I've run across plenty of people who teach a particular technique, belief or usage of symbolism who say "do it this way". When asked why, their answer is sometimes "because I said so". They may embroider that answer with all sorts of comely clothing, much of which preys upon the insecurities of those new and uncertain of their path.

I propose that we use some ethics and common sense when choosing symbols to incorporate into our magical work. Take the time to find out where the symbol came from. If you don't know about that culture, time period, tradition, learn about it. Learn about what the symbol represents, and if possible, how it was used. Try to find out when it was used, and when it was not. It may also help to know who used the symbol (clergy, laypeople, men, women, etc). You may not find answers to all of these questions, but they are a good checklist to keep in mind.

Clergy, teachers and mentors, use the Campsite Rule as it applies to baby Pagans (with thanks to Dan Savage; if you don't know his work, go read Savage Love immediately):

"In a relationship/interaction with a large age, power and/or experience gap, the older partner/more experienced partner has the responsibility to leave the younger/less experienced partner in at least as good a state (mentally, emotionally and physically) as before the relationship/interaction. The campsite rule includes things like leaving the younger/less experienced partner with no brainwashing, no unwanted guru worship, and not overburdening them with your own opinions/baggage." *

If you are learning from someone else, cultivate a "Spiritual BS meter". Any of the following scenarios may mean a red flag:

• Answers are phrased in a way that demeans you.
• The answer is "because I said so" on a consistent basis.
• Consistently tells you that what you think you know is wrong.
• Symbols are secret knowledge that you have to bow & scrape/pass unseemly hazing rituals/pay outrageous amounts of money to obtain.
• Only your teacher/guru/HP/book knows the REAL meaning. Everything else in the outside world is wrong or deceptive.
• Your teacher/guru/HP can use the symbols however they want, but you can't. (note: this is not an excuse to avoid proper research, learning and preparation of your own)
• Never says "I don't know".

Seekers, use critical thinking skills to do your own research. Taking this extra time will help you understand the context in which the symbol was originally used. It shows respect to the culture or tradition from which the symbol came. It makes your ritual work safer, and if I'm wrong about stored power, you still become more informed.

Everybody - try it for yourself. Meditate with symbols and see what impressions and feelings come up. Use symbols in rituals, spells, sigil and talisman construction. Become really familiar with them, and record your results. Remember, Contemporary Paganism is a living system, and you get what you give. Do the work - it's worth it!






*Slightly modified to fit this context, changes mine

Ritual Attire

The power of symbols, ritual tools, jewelry, masks and clothing is well known among all types of practitioners of magic. When we alter our appearance, it helps us to alter our consciousness in preparation for ritual or magical work. As we grow in experience, we learn that these things are not necessary. We are able to make magic in out in public, with no tools, and in our everyday clothing.

Ritual clothing, in particular, serves another function as well. In addition to helping to alter our own state of consciousness, it also affects the people around us. When we assume a leadership role, whether it be in teaching, leading ritual or providing spiritual services, it helps when we pay attention to our image. Like it or lump it, human beings care about and respond to how we look.

Pagans are pretty accepting – we don’t expect you to look like some Californian mass-media ideal of beauty. But presenting yourself well is still valuable. Take the time to bathe, apply scented oils, arrange your hair, put on spiritual jewelry and wear attractive clothing. Of course adjust this list to what fits you; the goal is to show through your appearance that you care for yourself. Practicing good posture helps too. People will have more confidence in you and give more weight to your words.

Contemporary Paganism being an ever-evolving community, we have a lot of options. We can use scholarship to look to the past and recreate what might have been. Others choose to wear some form of Christian-esque vestments (def: a robe of ceremony or office), which seems pretty smart, considering that most Americans are raised with some form of Christianity and thus automatically associate those types of garments with spiritual authority. Some go with the ubiquitous hooded robe common among witches and Druids. Yet others choose historical garments from the culture of their pantheon (for example, Heathens who wear Norse-style t-tunics).

In my opinion, what’s important is finding your own authentic image. Find something that speaks to your soul and makes you feel powerful, beautiful and sacred. Note my usage of the word authentic. It’s important to be aware of the trap that image-consciousness can create: it can be a way to get stuck with excessive ego or caught up in fantastical delusions. Keep it real, gang.

So as an Ordained Priestess, a shaman, a Yoga and martial arts teacher, what do I wear? Good question. That’s really a project in process. I’ve been through a lot of image evolutions in my mundane and spiritual life. You can really see the progress of my personal and spiritual development in those changes. Thank Goddess my close friends are supportive, that’s all I can say.

Early in my pagan career, I started with an undyed cotton robe based on a choir robe pattern. I still have it in storage, and I don’t feel beautiful when I wear it. I do feel humble and earthy, which feelings have their time and place. If I had had it with me, I would likely have worn it to my recent initiation, for example. A couple of winters ago, I made myself a righteous animal print fake fur ritual robe. I seriously love this robe. It is SO warm and I feel really good wearing it, both for witchy and shamanic pursuits. Protip: include fur-lined pockets.Trust me on this. Decadent!

In my last post, I tell the story of how I chose my new vestments. I ended up settling on garments that are traditional in India: salwar kameez and dupatta. Salwar are loose pajama pants, while the kameez is a long tunic (aka the kurta, which really refers to the men’s long tunic). The dupatta is a scarf, similar to what many Americans would know as a pashmina. See left for an example. I’m planning to make my own, because I enjoy sewing. I will likely make mine from cotton in bright colors.

What I like about this Indian-style garb is that it’s feminine, functional and street-friendly. I love a ritual robe, but I’m a very embodied person. I might feel the need to do some Yoga at a moment’s notice, get my groove on with some ecstatic dancing or bust out a headstand - all of which is awfully hard to do in a robe. At the same time, these clothes make me feel beautiful and connected to the Divine. It honors my spiritual foundations in Yoga. It also allows me to be out in public without getting too many stares.

I can also wear salwar kameez to Yoga class. I could even choose to wear the tunic with regular yoga pants. I have been struggling for some time to find my look for teaching Yoga. My Yoga teacher training taught us to wear something neutral, simple and professional so that our students focus on the teaching, not on us.

This bores me to tears and makes me sad. While from a business perspective, I’d like to reach as many people as I can…I’m just not willing to be bland. I don’t think that people really want boring Yoga teachers. Why come out of the house for someone who blends into the carefully neutral, calming studio walls? I personally want someone colorful, lively and inspiring – someone who has something interesting and different to offer. No offense, but I have had my fill of tall, slim, anemic, vegetarian and deadly earnest Yoga teachers. YAWN.

On the shamanic/woodsy side of things, I have a colorful history with what I have worn. There were a lot of broomstick skirts and gypsy sort of things for a while. I also purloined my mother’s hippie clothes from the 70’s. Thank Goddess no pictures remain of the handmade deerskin vest, loincloth and knee-high sandals of my teenage years. Egads. My tastes these days are more in the medieval woodswoman/mountain woman range. Yes, I too made myself a hat from an animal skin, with the bobcat’s face on the front of my head. Sorry, vegans -it's a shaman thing!

Since I’m a huntress and devotee of Artemis and the Horned One, my plan currently is to tan the next deerskins I take and make a pair of breeches and a jerkin (basically a long vest). Maybe a hood, we’ll see. With that I’ll wear the set of knee high moccasins (with fur, beads and a hidden knife sheath) that I’m working to finish up by this fall. That means I’ll have to finish up the fancy leather gun belt I’ve been planning for years…with a pistol on one side and my antique Bowie knife on the other.  

Ah, did I not mention my warrior side? Yeah, that’s a part of me as well. Training students in martial arts again is another thing on my list, and it too requires a uniform. A simple black gi (think karate uniform) and the black belt passed on to me by my sensei will do for that. On warm days, I created a t-shirt design for me and the class to wear with gi pants. No trouble there.

So, to sum up: examine who you are and what you do. Choose ritual, spiritual and liturgical clothing accordingly. Look well groomed and put together. Embrace your own power. Be awesome. Don’t let anyone dim your light and ROCK ON. You know I will!

Ordination Report

I've been struggling with what to say about last week's initiation and ordination. Like many practitioners, I don't like to speak too much of magical work. But I also feel compelled to talk about this pivotal experience. So here we go!

My fast didn't go well at all. Kitchari did not give me enough energy to get through the day, and the whole thing fell apart. It seems that a week-long fast is not in the cards for me these days, unless that fast includes animal protein at lunchtime. I can get away with eggs and vegetables for breakfast, but a full day of massage means a full lunch or I melt down. I also ended up eating red meat for dinner - probably because I hadn't gotten enough calories and protein earlier in the day. After some soul searching, I decided to simply accept the demands of my body. Instead of restricting what I ate so rigidly, I focused on eating mindfully. I blessed each meal and took time to honor the Divine and feel gratitude.

I didn't have time to make a new ritual robe. I probably could have done it if I had a sewing machine at home, but going to a friend's house to work just didn't fit into the ol' calendar. Instead, I ended up with the perfect set of vestments for me, in typically synchronistic fashion.

A while ago, a friend of mine from India gave me a white kurta, which is a knee length cotton tunic with lovely white embroidery around the neckline. I've never worn it. It hung in my closet awaiting some special occasion. Meanwhile, back in yoga teacher training, we talked about clothing to wear while teaching. In the Yoga tradition, all white was the traditional color to wear.  My teachers and colleagues said they thought I ought to do it; that it would look good on me, etc.

That was nearly a year ago, and I've been searching for white yoga clothes ever since. It's a little tricky for me, being busty and swarthy as I am. Hello, mediterranean heritage! So far, I have found a white sports bra and a white camisole. I never really thought of wearing the kurta with it. In my head, I was looking for "some kind of white overshirt", but I never connected the dots to what was already in my closet.

As I prepared for this initiation, I thought of wearing a white robe. At some point, it occurred to me: why not wear a white yoga-style outfit? I could wear my kurta! So I did. I found some random knit capri pants, which I didn't really like, but got me through the night. I put on my white sports bra, the camisole and the kurta.

It felt right. Yoga is a big part of my spirituality, though I don't often think of it that way. But for me, it truly is the foundation of my practice. It's been a presence throughout my entire life, and it's how I was introduced to mindfulness, meditation, self-awareness and so many other things. In a way, it's like air. You never think about it, but you are breathing it all the time. This was a lovely way to honor that part of my life, and I feel very comfortable in those clothes to boot.

The day of my initiation was somewhat of a disaster. I took the entire day off, put my email on auto-respond and my phone on vibrate. It was supposed to be this restful, meditative day. Instead, every single thing was a trial. I had to run errands in the morning. I forgot a doctor's appointment and had to go over there in a hurry. I didn't get home until noon, and then I remembered I was supposed to be at a massage appointment at 4! And the cupcakes still needed to be baked! And what about my ritual bath?! Aaaaagghhhhh!!!

The ritual bath turned into a shower with chanting. The cupcakes got packed up and put in the truck unfrosted. I scrambled up to my massage and that too was a trial, but I soldiered on. Luckily, my best friend let me come over and use his kitchen to frost the cupcakes. This was a blessing in disguise as I then got hugs and congratulations from this very important person in my life.

Finally I got there and my High Priestess gave me this look. She knew exactly what was going on. I smiled and told her that I got a lesson in priestesshood: we have to do it in the midst of everyday chaos. She just nodded, full of understanding.

The ritual was lovely. My HP surprised me by including references to my shamanic journey in addition to my journey as a witch. I was truly overwhelmed by the love and support in the room. I feel so blessed to have found these women. They show me what love and support is supposed to feel like and I am so grateful.

My ordination with the Universal Life Church was much more prosaic: just a matter of a few mouse clicks. Now, the ULC doesn't necessarily have the best reputation. They will take anyone, and they do not require any type of training. Literally anyone over 13 can become a minister in their church.

But for someone like me, it's perfect. I have been studying for this all my life. I don't need further training to call myself a priestess. The ULC is interfaith - and my public work right at this moment is interfaith. The UFC also expressly does not require one to "kiss the ring", as it were. I don't do authoritarian structures well. A benevolent, accepting umbrella organization? Yes, thank you!

It also turns out that the ULC was started right here in NC, by a Christian minister who believed in religious freedom including freedom FROM religion. I love these words from their mission:

"We further proclaim that "We are all Children of the same Universe" and as such we each have a right to be here. Thus said, that is the way that your God and Mother Nature planned it."

Now that's something I can get behind.

So now it's a week later. The dust is beginning to settle. I've made my announcement about the event to friends and clients. Folks have teasingly called me "Reverend Tanaria". This amuses me. I will call myself an Ordained Priestess. I don't have a ministry, I have a priestessry. Sure it's weird, but so what? So am I!

In service to the Gods, I continue to serve all seekers who come to me with honest yearning for truth in their hearts, no matter what their path. Truly, this has always been my path. Now it's official.

Blessed be!

Happy Litha One and All

Today the sun is at its peak. The plants are riotous with growth, and we are already enjoying luscious fresh vegetables and fruits. The animals are playing, mating, birthing, growing. The fervent, unstoppable striving for life of the God as Green Man is at its peak. The Earth herself is fecund, gravid, bringing forth new life over and over again with unimaginable abundance. I wish the blessings of the Gods upon all beings on this day of joy.

Yet as with all things, there is a shadow side to this holiday. As a species, humanity has come so far in its conception of the world. Of life and its meaning. Of our place in the scheme of things. The evolution of our interconnected global village has revealed the amazing variety among human culture. It is accepted as fact that all humans, regardless of race or gender, are human. All sentient, thinking, feeling beings, capable of the full spectrum of emotion and behavior.

But it was not always so, and some people still do not accept this fact. Today I watched a film, "Twelve Years a Slave", which chronicles the experience of a free black man who was kidnapped and enslaved in 1841. Not many minutes had passed before my partner remarked that I would be soon be yelling at the TV. He was right. Mere words cannot express the intolerable choler of rage that filled me. 

I can remember when I first learned about slavery. I didn't take it well. It is no easier for me now, some 30 years later. I didn't understand it then, and I certainly do not understand it now. Oh, on some intellectual level, I can see the outlines of the justification of this behavior. But my heart does not accept this crime against humanity, against the Earth's children, against the Divine.

For we Pagans know the truth of the matter. All beings, whether they be human, animal, plant or mineral - ALL BEINGS CONTAIN THE DIVINE ESSENCE. All beings are constructed of the same energy, and that energy IS the Divine. This is the Spirit which connects us all. Spirit IS all. 

It is important to note that this energy is the building block of the Earth herself. The reality is that this entire planet is a giant organism. Even physicists are catching on to this fact. Go read some Fred Alan Wolf and see what I mean. Environmental educators and pioneers of the field like Thomas Berry, Aldo Leopold, John Muir and Edward Abbey knew this truth. Go read them as well. Some terms are different, but the spirit is the same.

"The universe is a communion of subjects, not a collection of objects."

-Thomas Berry

If this is so, then all beings have value. All beings have a right to existence, or at least the chance to exist. All beings deserve dignity and respect. From the lowliest zygote to the mighty mountain, we are all one.

If this is so, then no being can be owned. At least, not in the Westernized conception of ownership. The Earth too cannot be owned. Does the flea own the inch of the elephant's hide on which it resides? No. Instead, we are but stewards and caretakers of a fleeting and ephemeral nature. Even our bodies are worn but for an eye blink. They too, return to the Earth of which they came.

So on this blessed day of Litha, of the Summer Solstice, take a moment to reflect. Take a moment to honor those before us who endured captivity, indentured servitude and slavery. Take a moment to honor the animals who have lost their homes to urban development, who have died in inadequate zoos or from neglectful owners or abandonment. Take a moment to honor those who have fought and died for their belief that things should be different. Take a moment to lend support to those beings who still live with cruelty, exploitation and abuse.

Take a moment to commune with our Mother Earth, who has suffered so much for our evolution, yet who continues to love and provide for us.

Take a moment to look into the shadow, that the light may shine ever more brightly within you and that the beauty which surrounds us this Litha day may become ever more precious. 

Join me, brothers and sisters. Speak up for what is true and right. Stamp out intolerance and cruelty wherever you find it; replace it with compassion and love. Let us shine the light of respect and reverence into every corner of the globe. Let us make each step we take be a prayer.

So mote it be!

Keeping the Faith: Carrying the Flame of Hope in Uncertain Times

I've just read Rewilding Witchcraft, an article posted by Scarlet Imprint. It's a powerful piece about the health of our planet and how that impacts witchcraft, and it has me all roiled up. This post is my response, so it won't fully make sense unless you read the article.

I reject despair. I reject the notion that witchcraft is broken, fading or failing. I reject the notion that our rituals must be a lament for a dying Earth. This article is full of such pain, and for that, the author has my sympathy.

I agree, Earth is at a crisis point. Human beings have had an unimaginably huge impact on the ecosystem. We are beginning to see all sorts of changes as a result. I have been angry and upset about this situation for as long as I can remember. By middle school, I was known as "The Crusader". I circulated endless petitions and spoke passionately to anyone who would listen about the need for environmental restoration and conservation.

But I also found that activism is largely pointless in terms of creating policy change. The US government is inextricably linked with corporate interests. By and large, those corporations are interested in just one thing: making money, at any and all costs to the human population and to our environment. They just don't care that people wave signs. They won't care until the last drop of oil is extracted, and the environmental ruin comes to the gate of their compounds. Or until the group of people demonstrating becomes the majority instead of a vocal minority. Even then, I wouldn't rule out military law.

I don't say this to disparage friends and colleagues who choose to engage in this way. I respect their commitment and their valiant efforts. But I also know that I can't do it anymore. I have an inflated sense of justice, and when I spend my energy in this way, I descend into anger, hatred and despair. That means that I can't do my work. I can't lift others up or open their minds, especially in my environmental education work, with this sorrow eating away at my heart.

I also agree that witchcraft needs to regain its wild roots. That is exactly the work I want to do in the coven I am forming. We need to get out of our living rooms and onto the land. This is no time for esoteric, cerebral ritual. This is a time to get our fingernails dirty, our hair wind snarled and our faces glowing with the kiss of the sun. We need to connect with the spirits of this place, not just give a generic "thanks to the Earth". Ritual thanking plants and animals is hollow if we don't know those plants and animals personally.

But there too…that is my path. It may not be the path for all, and as a fiercely independent person, I can't ethically say that others should do what I do. Not everyone can, for starters. Some of the most powerful spiritual experiences I have had have been on mountaintops or in remote wilderness. Places one can only get to with a lot of physical effort and a minimum of physical impediment. It is not for me to say that other experiences are less valuable, less witchy, less anything. I don't believe that they are, and I resent any implication to that effect.

The article feels disjointed, as if the author is trying to jam disparate concepts together. The land is suffering, yes. But that doesn't mean that witchcraft is broken, or that our spirituality must become something ugly to reflect the pain of the Earth. Nor does every witch bear the responsibility of activism in order to justify their faith. The author seems to be calling for a revolution in witchcraft. A re-imagining of the craft as some some of zombie movie-esque apocalyptic funeral mass. But it also sounds like that is the path of this author. Which is fine. He or she is angry. He or she is full of despair and sadness. Express that. Do as you will. But don't for a second believe you have the right to dismiss the faith of the rest of us.

I refuse to stop honoring the land on which I live. I refuse to stop singing to the Cape Fear River which flows near my home. Are the land and the river impacted by industrialism? Surely. Most of the land here has been cash cropped for generations, producing mostly tobacco and cotton. I have no doubt that the methods used have exhausted the soil and contributed to erosion. The Cape Fear River has been the center of controversy lately because of Duke Power's coal ash contamination.

But must I wail in lament? Must I hold a funerary mass for my dying home? I say no. The Earth is not dying. She will correct Herself, and that may involve exterminating humanity in the long run. But She has been here for untold eons and will remain for eons to come. The Earth as Mother Gaia does not despair. The plants and animals as the Horned Lord simply keep growing. Keep striving for existence. Plants grow up through the cracks of untended cement. The forest returns to barren meadows every chance it gets. Foxes adapt and live in cities. Life never gives up.

This author may do what he or she likes. As for me, I will sing. I will dance. I will celebrate the beauty that still surrounds me. I will live in as ecologically friendly a manner as I can. I will educate others about humanity's true place in the world - a member of the global ecosystem, not as the master of it. I will get wild, be poetic and will never give up hope.

For as long as one person carries the flame of hope, humanity and our capacity for faith, beauty and reverence will never die.

So mote it be!