The Long Nights are Ending...and the New Year has Begun

Today the Golden Eagle appeared to me, on the side of the road. This is the sort of everyday miracle that reminds us that the transcendant is not other, it is not beyond us or apart from us. The sacred lives in each moment; each moment is a space that contains the infinite potential of reality. Each moment is both prosaic and sublime.

A hawk, perhaps a sharp shinned, perched on a power line in the biting cold of this Sierra Nevada winter morning....the morning of the last day of the calendar year. Suddenly, a huge form winged in and hovered, suspended in the air with wings outstretched for a timeless time...it was huge. Majestic is a word that immediately permeated my being.

Here was power, the power of the skies, the winds, and the storm. Here was the power of the sky fire, the lightning. Could this be connected to the Thunderbird? Sacred transformer, spirit journeyer, beloved of the sun god of the skies, I honor you. Are you calling to me?

My breathing stopped...even my heart skipped a beat. Was this happening? Could this be a golden eagle? It dwarfed the hawk, and landed as if it was the natural ruler of all it surveyed...all it could reach by wing. The whole world its home, the eagle flies in these desert mountains, among the clouds, above the sage brush and the ancient stones, bones of our Mother Earth, Gaia, Pachamama, sacred ground.

As soon as I could, I ran to the oracle to identify this visitation. It could also have been a juvenile Bald Eagle. But I knew in my guts that it wasn't. It was Golden Eagle. When I realized the truth, my whole being felt light, and I fairly vibrated around on my way. I went out into the purifying cold and hiked to a spot with a beautiful view of the Carson Valley. I offered the song of my flute in gratitude.

Eagle soars above, ruler of the skies. Eagle can signal us to find or acknowledge our path. Eagle can inspire us to heights previously unimagined. Eagle, spirit of the Upper World, beloved of the Sun, bringer of the bliss of illumination and enlightenment.

These are some words about its medicine, but keep in mind that the lessons of our spirit guides are individual much of the time. No written source can tell you the message coming from a totem at a given time. Meditation, prayer, and dreams reveal its meaning, often over time.

Many solar gods are equated with this symbol, giving the eagle associations with the lifting of depression or a more conscious awareness. 

Lofty ambitions that require great skill to achieve. 

An alternative lightning emblem. In ancient Greece, people placed eagles on temple rooftops to protect the building from lightning, as they felt this creature controlled the fire from the sky. 

Eagles are commanding presences. Whether they want to or not, they attract attention. Those with this animal personality have strong leadership skills and take swift action when it is needed. 

Among ancient Mediterranean people, the eagle was associated with the sun god, fire, and lightning. Zeus, the father of the classical gods, took the form of an eagle when he carried his young lover Ganymede to Mt. Olympus. 

For the Romans, this bird became a kind of totem for the emperor, who was thought to reincarnate as an eagle. Alternatively, this may also symbolize traditionally masculine characteristics like pride and fierceness developing. 

The eagle became a popular symbol of power among the Germanic people because the great bird was representative of Wodan, the ruler of the gods. 

Because the eagel could appear to fly so close to the sun, the Medicine priests of all the tribes regarded the large bird as a very special messenger of the Great Mystery. 

In India, the Vedic tradition also portrays the eagle as a messenger of divinity and as the bearer of soma, the favorite drink of the Vedi gods, from Indra. 

The eagle was the totemic form of Prometheus, who "stole" fire from heaven, like the eastern fire-lightning-sun hero, man, or angel embodied in the Garuda bird. Garuda flew to the mountain of paradise to steal the gods' secret of immortality. Later, he assumed the golden body of the sun. American Indians had a similar hero, the thunderbird or lightning bird. 

If the eagle has appeared to you in your dreams or visions and revealed itself as your totem animal, you may expect to receive renewed strength of body, mind, and spirit. At the same time, you will find your meditations becoming more profound and your visions more prophetic in content. If you maintain a harmonious and balanced lifestyle, you will feel a stronger connection with the Great Mystery than ever before in your spiritual pilgrimage on earth. 

Just as the eagle can soar high above the earth and rise above its companions and its competitors, you must guard against the powerful eagle vibrations causing you to withdraw from your family and friends and grow aloof from your community. If you listen carefully to your spirit helper, it will instruct you in the sacred responsibility of sharing your prophetic insights with others and show you how to become the most effective kind of spiritual teacher. 

This new year, it is a year of power, both on a global scale and a personal one for me. One of the first teachings I got from this visitation was to trust what I am becoming, and to fly a new path. Yes. I hear you, Great One. I hear you, Eagle. Let us journey together and see what lies beyond the misty mountains. What is in the West, where the Sun goes down?

What will be in this new year? What will you create? What heights will you scale? What will you hunt?

Let the blessings flow into us all like the golden light of the Sun, and may you be blessed by the wingbeats of the Golden Eagle. Ho, Ruler of the Skies! Ho, fire of the Sun! Ho, ruler of the storm! Ho, spirit lightning!

I welcome you, light of the Sun! The Long Nights are ending and the New Year has begun!

Blessed be. Naho! Namaste. OM shanti!

Pilgrimage of the Great Wheel: Great Dismal Swamp

This weekend, I had the opportunity to visit the Great Dismal Swamp, which is a point on the Pilgrimage of the Great Wheel. This sacred journey is something that has come to me in the last couple of years - I am visiting all the points of a great wheel of ley lines that covers the southeast of the US to experience their power and to honor these sacred places. Check out that linked post for details.

The Great Dismal Swamp is a lonely expanse of wood and marsh and swamp, and an area rich with history. It's a wildlife refuge, and was once used as a hideout on the Underground Railroad during the US Civil War. Local legends are rich concerning this place. It's a wild place, an impenetrable wilderness, a liminal space where the touches of civilization and law were light. What this land was to pre-European peoples I do not know, but I do know that they lived here - it was a vast region, once. To my eyes, it is a fascinating place. What secrets are hidden in its tangled wood? What lurks beneath its black waters? What do the fearsome stings of the swarming insects protect?

For me, this visit was a continuation of a period of intensive underworld work. The guardians of the underworld have made themselves known to me. I have been doing a great deal of journeywork, shadow work - working with the dark, hidden places within and below. Reflective, visionary work. Quiet, powerful work.

I spent the weekend mostly at the nearby Merchant's Millpond, which is another kind of swamp....a still place of towering cypress and tupelo gum, an enchanted, watery forest. A place in which the veil between the world is as thin as spider silk. A place where I was honored to witness a vulture feed. Turkey vultures and black vultures had found a deer, possibly lost in Hurricane Matthew, on the hummock of a cypress. There were birds at the carcass, birds in the branches, and yet more vultures circling in the sky above.

Sacred transformer, death eagle, purifier - I honor your wisdom! Teach me to soar on the thermals of life, conserving energy until opportunity presents itself. Teach me to ingest refuse, that which no longer serves, and bring it back into the great cycle, to take on new life and power my wings.

Teach me the mysteries of death, that gentle release that frees the spirit to carry on its journey. Teach me to release what is tired and worn-out and unnecessary, making space for the needed and new. Teach me, sacred Vulture!

When I came to the Great Dismal Swamp, I startled a vulture by the side of the road. It flew so close to me that it took my breath away. I was crawling along in my truck with all the windows down and there was this enormous bird, feathers looking more brown than black, with a mottled texture. It flew in front of me for some time before drifting into the woods.

Later, a Great Blue Heron led me deeper into the swamp, flying above the canal as I drove behind on the road. On and on it flew, gracefully gliding over the black waters...I honor you, heron! Teach me the ways of the stalker, the patient hunter who stands in the shallows, silent as a shadow, who strikes swift as an arrow.

Heron led me to Drummond Lake, which was much larger than I supposed. I paused here, ate and drank, made offering to the land. This writing is what happened next.


The voice of Spirit comes to me as the land.
Today, it says, do not hurry
do not do.
Today, sit in the swamp wind and be.
Simply exist.
Be present with the holly and the honeysuckle
the fox grape, the sumac, and the corpse berry.
Soak up the last sun of autumn,
glowing golden timeless time,
like the turtle on driftwood silver and brown
let the tiny yellow moth draw you in
to the meadow, sere and dry
wooly marsh grass waving like flags in the breeze

Today the voice of Spirit beckons
come and be with me
Commune with me as this place
Mother grandmother swamp
Listen to your sisters the songbirds
Listen to your mother the waters burbling
Watch your brothers, the waves
Let the four winds cleanse you
and father sky lift you up.

Be.
Be as one with the land
Exist in this dying time,
last blazing of beauty
before winter's sleep

Today I honor the Great Mystery
that moves within all things.
Today, I am free.

- JN 10/30/16


This weekend was passed in the dark of the Moon. I paddled the waters, I walked the land, I bathed in
the sun, listened to the rain, drank in the starlight, was cleansed by the winds, and offered my songs to the land. Mother grandmother swamp, I honor you! Your waters fill my dreams and draw me deep, deep below, to the underworld, the land of the ancestors, the home of the fae, kingdom of the Horned One.

I honor you, Great Medicine Wheel of Jomeokee! Great Guide, this pilgrimage I make in your honor. This land I walk to gain your wisdom, each step trodden by countless ancestors who have gone before me. Fill me with your medicine. Teach me, Great Guide. Lead me on...

Blessed be! Naho!

Sort of Solar Deity

 I spent yesterday evening on the water, with the animals. I spotted a muskrat licking itself under the roots of a holly tree at the water's edge. It swam off and we trailed behind in the boat, following it all the way to its den under the roots of yet another holly tree.

An eagle flew past and disappeared into a cove. Later, we drifted down to that cove. By and by, I saw movement, but couldn't identify it. A few minutes later, I was blessed to see the eagle take off and fly past us, so close that I could see its individual feathers. I watched it fly all the way across the lake and land in a tree.

Later, we followed an osprey as it flew along the bank. It circled its mate, who took off and followed us as we continued on. All along the lake's edge, we saw Great Blue Herons stalking their prey.

This is my life. Everywhere I go, the animals say hello and I silently return the greeting. Sometimes we meet eyes. Sometimes they get right in my face; at other times they move away, slowly or quickly. Occasionally I surprise them, and often they surprise me.

I have always had an affinity for animals. When small, I was that child rescuing the baby birds and endlessly playing with the kittens. Nearly always, pets love me, even when they are normally shy or distrustful.

Before I knew what sort of pagan I was, I knew that animals were on my side. I don't know when I figured out that crows were my main totem. It was early on, perhaps even before I knew that I was a pagan at all. Without any particular spiritual tutoring, I listened for their messages. Much later, I learned from Native Americans, but truly, what they said echoed what I already knew in my heart. Perhaps it was my dad's influence - he was a consummate hunter, and taught me to see everything. He too had a way with creatures.

Cernunnos, then, is a natural fit for me. Lord of Beasts, God of the Wood, ruler of nature, protector of wild things. He is not, perhaps, a deity one would think of first when discussing solar deities. He is more associated with the moon, with the dark of night, with the dark of the deep woods. But then, I'm not primarily a solar person.

There are times when I love to soak up the sun. After a cold winter. Lying on the deck of a sailboat. Meditating on river rocks. I love the feeling of melting warmth at those times, but I can only tolerate it in small doses. To do that, I have had to learn to surrender to it. Surrender is not my natural inclination; I value my ability to create change in the world. Passivity is difficult for me. But when the sun is near its zenith, I am not capable of much more than soaking it up passively. Friends have described me like a lily - over about 80 degrees Fahrenheit, I tend to wilt.

So then, Cernunnos. Like many contemporary pagans, I associate the male aspect of deity with the sun. It seems to me that I have read at least one source that associates the horned lord with the sun. I faintly recall some reference to Cernunnos specifically, but most do not. Honestly, I'm not a big fan of the traditional solar deities.

One might think I would follow Apollo, given my devotion to Artemis. One would be wrong. Apollo strikes me as a douchebag (sorry, dude). If Apollo was a human, he'd be that blonde captain of the football team full of himself and his beauty, and I'd snub him at a party to go hang out with Pan, who'd be a scruffy alternative kid. Helios? I don't know him well, and I feel no affinity. I do like Lugh, but we are still getting to know each other.

I suppose the most I can do at this point is to say that I value balance. I honor the Moon and the Sun, the Goddess and the God. I am looking forward to Litha, at which ritual I will honor the Sun without choosing a specific deity to focus upon.

30 Days of Deity Devotion: Day 1

Tonight the crescent moon told me to start my month of deity devotion. I may follow the 30 Days of Deity Devotion (30DODD) format, but I will also change it up. 'Cause I'm like that.

Day 1 of 30DODD is intended to be a general introduction. For this 30DODD, I will be writing about Artemis. She of the crescent moon, Huntress of the Golden Bow, Goddess of lonely peaks and clear running streams, is my patroness. She is a powerful and multi-faceted Goddess of the Greek pantheon. She is the Lady of Wild Beasts. She protects women, children and baby animals. She is also connected to music and dance. To the stars. To mountains, to lakes and rivers. She is the Light Bearer, she is the Savior.

Much has been written about Artemis. Instead of an exhaustive introduction to her as a deity, I will instead share the story of a recent hike and how I connected with her in a new way:

I connected with Artemis in her guise as she-bear, the great mother, today.

"Bear, Bear, you who rule the heaven, the stars, and the whole world; you who make the axis turn and control the whole cosmic system by force and compulsion; I appeal to you." - PGM VII:686-702

I don't now recall how it came to pass, but I do think a lot when I hike. I tend to cycle through all the subjects until my spirit is calm again. At any rate, today, I particularly remember thinking about it when I was on my hill. My Inner Temple is based on this place and today as I hiked up the hill, I felt a strong connection to the she-bear. I remembered that this is one of the faces of Artemis. A light began to shine in my mind.

I began to reconsider my interactions with bear out in the wilderness. I have been both attracted and afraid. That's a signal that a lesson is brewing, but until now I have never understood what this meant.

Part of the lesson of bear, in animal medicine terms, is facing fear as a pathway to power. So previously, I just thought about the lessons of earth power and the cave/bear den. I really hadn't connected the dots with the feminine divine or with Artemis.

Consider my trip to the Black Canyon of Gunnison. I hiked alone down into the canyon, even though the rangers warned me that a bear had been spotted on the trail no more than thirty minutes before I began. Sure enough, I heard a bear, so I began to sing. The route down into the canyon isn't really a trail; it's more of a drainage. It requires a bit of rock climbing technique at times. Once you begin, there aren't a lot of places to stop, nor is it particularly practical to change your mind. 

The bear was with me all the way down the mountain. That kept me awake and aware during a really dicey descent. I doubt I would have been quite so careful had I not been concerned about the bear. I met some folks at the bottom that had been scared by the bear too. We ended up camping together for the night, which was fun. Great folks! At any rate, I was feeling paralyzed by fear and still remember lying awake in my tent, listening for the slightest sound. Which, sure enough, materialized. The bear walked all around our camp, snuffling and breathing audibly.

At other times I feel bear is near and I don't feel afraid. I also have a strong aversion to hunting bear, though it is legal in my area. Surely this is partially due to my hunting ethics - I don't hunt predators in these days of rampant habitat destruction and systemic extermination. But perhaps there is something deeper at work…what if that is the way She shows herself to me? I do feel she's come to me in women, as well. But that's a topic for another post.

The She-Bear. It makes sense. Another piece of the puzzle has fallen into the place. Hail Artemis!

Lizard Medicine

Yesterday, I was preparing for a party. I needed to put some yard tools away in the barn. As I neared the door, I startled a lizard. Normally, lizards disappear when startled.

This one moved closer to me, on to the glass door of the barn.

I stopped to take a good look at this tiny being. It had tree frog-esque toes, a pale underbelly and a light chartreuse back with a tan/beige stripe all the way down its spine. Neon green ringed its eyes. I could see its lungs moving as it breathed.

It looked back at me.

I settled in to watch. Surely, this creature would scuttle off at my slightest move.

It looked back at me.

I realized somewhere in here that this was yet another visitation by an animal teacher. I have a lot of avian and mammal medicine; not so much reptile or amphibian. What does this mean?

At length, and it could have been as much as five or ten minutes, I had to get moving with the rest of my tasks. I quietly walked through the door, deposited my tools and backed out of the barn.

Closing the inner door would surely startle the lizard, right? Nope.

Looking through the glass at my little friend, I hesitated; should I or should I not disturb it by closing the glass door? Yes. I won't be back, and our guests will be here soon. I close the door.

The lizard looks back at me.

I hear you, little one. Thank you for your teachings. Be well.

~

Later, I identified the lizard as a Green Anole, latin name Anolis Carolinensis. The males are territorial, and breeding season stretches throughout spring and summer. It is possible that this was a male protecting his territory, or a female protecting her egg. Interestingly, though, I did not observe any of the associated behaviors such as chin bobbing.

The animal medicine of Lizard is about detachment and observation. It encourages us to detach from current issues emotionally and do what must be done.

Also, from the interwebs:

"It’s time to take do an internal audit. Are you being ruled by your ego or are you coming from your heart? Be aware – simply because the ego is the master of deception and you will often have to peel back many layers to get at the truth – and to discover what your heart is really telling you. Take the time to really focus on your personal dreams."

The Unwelcome Medicine of Pests

A few years ago, I moved back to North Carolina from Colorado. During those Colorado years, I spent a lot of time outdoors, and it was blissfully free from insects. There's nothing like summertime camping in a breathtaking alpine meadow...especially when you're originally from an area where a similar scene would mean irritation, constant slapping and bug spray.

Since I've been back in the South, I believe that the insects have been paying back every sting-free year. Somehow, they've compressed 11 years of freedom into just 4 of pain. My feet and legs have borne the brunt of this insectile attack. Mosquitos, gnats and noseeums I can stand, but the fire ant bites...oh, the fire ant bites.

The first year I was back, I got Chaco sandals. <cue ominous chord here>

As you might expect, it's warm enough for sandals for a good many months each year here. As a pagan, environmental educator and avid backpacker...I'm outside a lot. Wearing sandals.

Somehow, some way, the fire ants find me every time. I may be with a group of people, walking the same trail, or standing around in the same area. No one else is bothered most of the time. Me? Covered with ants.

The most entertaining story comes from last fall. I was leading a meeting of the Artemis Circle, which is an ongoing club spun off from an awesome girls summer camp that I teach. On this particular lovely day, we were planning to look for wildflowers for pressing. We'd cast a circle, everyone was happy, and I thought, hey, here's a hill we haven't climbed! Let's go, girls!

We climbed the hill and were briefly admiring the view. It couldn't have been more than a minute when I started to feel the pain. I looked down and sure enough, I was covered with ants. I brushed off the ones I could see, but the pain didn't stop. I had to get out of there! I started to run and was actually yelping with pain.

Imagine, if you will, a grown woman running and screaming, trailing a string of giggling 12 year olds.

I don't think they knew what was happening. Running and hollering is something we did as a group, being a high-spirited bunch of Artemisians as we were.

I got off the hill, but the pain didn't stop there. For the next hour as I was teaching, I kept feeling new pains. At first, I thought it was just paranoia. But later examination proved that some of the ants had climbed into my clothes and bit me all the way up to my right armpit.

<WAH WAH WAH music here>

Right. Fire ants are an invasive species. They were unwittingly introduced to the USA by a cargo ship in the early 1900's. Humans, even pagans, have a hard time loving pests. Usually our reverence and conservation efforts are reserved for the more appealing animals, like seals, bald eagles, horses, whales, big cats, etc. Who ever heard of someone with a mosquito totem? Or jellyfish totem?

But it is my belief that all beings are animated by the same Divine energy, and all beings have a place in the ecosystem. We call the fire ants invaders, but they are just doing what all species do - expand into new & hospitable environments and carry on their mode of existence.

What's more, from a shamanic perspective, animals have rich lessons to teach us. It occurred to me this morning, as I practiced Yoga, that I was looking at this fire ant plague in entirely the wrong way. They aren't trying to take my blissful sandal-wearing freedom away. They're just being ants. Is it possible, just maybe, that they are trying to teach me something?

I consulted my trusty copy of Animal-Speak by Ted Andrews.

Ant medicine is all about organization. Building infrastructure for our lives. Working tenaciously toward goals. Collaborating with others. Patience. Self-discipline.

You know that feeling when you read or hear something you don't want to hear? Perhaps it's coming from someone you don't like, or it's being presented in a challenging context. Maybe it's something you don't want to believe about yourself. But yet, you KNOW it's true, and no amount of emotional squirming is going to change that fact.

It hit me like a thunderbolt. These are the lessons of this phase of my life. I made a major life change four years ago. I've re-launched my career, becoming a self-employed professional. I've been learning about working with others in an effective way. I've been stepping my self-improvement efforts into high gear, disciplining myself to make healthier choices.

BANGO!

I hear you, little ones. I am listening. I understand. Thank you.

p.s. Can you ease up on the stings now, please? I'll be good, I promise!